Agreeing to Disagree: Overcoming Communication Conundrums in Relationships

relation1Even in the strongest of relationships, there will be times when small irritations can cause mountains to grow out of molehills, so it’s important to keep striving for better communication.

As the essence of relationships, communication has a great impact on every aspect of life. Yet the channels of communication can sometimes become blocked, even among people who care deeply for each other. It’s often difficult to put our feelings into words or concentrate fully when our partner speaks. Unhelpful silences or verbal attacks can arise and drive us further apart.

Common barriers to communication include: threatening or unpleasant behavior such as criticism and bossiness; only hearing what we want to hear; getting bored or distracted; and not expressing our point clearly. Fortunately, working on our communication skills helps us to break through this sort of impasse. So follow these tried and tested tips to stop you reaching for the expletives and reach an understanding instead.

No matter what else is going on, try to make time for your partner on a day-to-day basis. Good communication is about deepening your understanding of each

Making Conversation: A Skill, Not an Art

relation2Do cocktail parties strike terror in your heart? If so, you are not alone. Although the ability to converse with others comes naturally to some, it is a skill that most of us must develop.
Many women don’t realize that effective conversation has little to do with what you know, but everything to do with how you present yourself. The 19th century French novelist Guy de Maupassant said it best:

“Conversation … is the art of never appearing a bore, of knowing how to say everything interestingly, to entertain with no matter what, to be charming with nothing at all.”

The ability to converse well with others is not some elusive thing, obtainable only by a chosen few. With a little elbow grease, even shy women can learn to feel comfortable speaking with anyone, about anything. Here’s my tried and true formula:

  • Take a personal inventory. Make a list of your personal strengths and accomplishments. Keep this with you at all times, and add to it. Review it regularly, but especially before entering social situations that usually cause you discomfort. This will remind

Coping with the Loss of a Spouse

relation4Dealing with the loss of a spouse can be one of the most traumatic and stressful events in a person’s life. This loss often occurs during a stage when many other changes are occurring. Children are grown and have moved away, the couple has retired and has experienced a significant change in routine, financial status may be up or down, contacts with friends and acquaintances may have been curtailed and the widow or widower’s own health may be declining.

During this time of dramatic upheaval where physical, psychological and spiritual boundaries are challenged, accepting that the grieving process will not be brief makes the whole process even more difficult. In going through this mourning period with many individuals, I have found that a period of one to two years is often necessary. The grieving process, given its length is not too extreme, is one of the most essential elements in the healing process.

Reconstructing a daily pattern of life, during the early months of grieving, can be very difficult. Many individuals find themselves alone for the first time since early adulthood. Loneliness seems intolerable and

What men want in a relationship

It is commonly said that women are complex in mental nature while men remain easy to understand and simple. Whatever be the reasons that backup this comment, in relationships both men and women follow slightly diverted paths. What men look for in a relationship is not what motivates women to fall in relationships. The differences in desires, mentalities, passion, expression levels etc., are resulted from some unknown causes; might be hormonal differences, mindset changes or social concepts.

Women get time to be settled in a relationship, but if settled down, they remain so dedicated and sacrificing for it; while men jump into relationships so easily and get out of it with same easiness. However, experts say that if provided with the requirements and if matched with his desires, even men ardently remain in the relationships.

Unconditional love

Demands and conditions are a big turn off for men of all nature. Men prefer unconditional love, especially in a relationship. Many women adhere often to the mistake of demanding or putting forward certain conditions in return to the love offered.

It is a common nature of men that mechanical way of life makes them bored and frustrated soon. They want life like a free flowing leaf

Common Relationship Myths

Relationships within the family and outside family are subject to constant debates as being an abstract and indefinable aspect of human life; they remain very much confused and uncertain. In fact, human relationships are very much subjective. The depth, meaning, happiness etc., differ from person to person. Following the exact path of a successful relationship in one person’s life may not be equally beneficial or another one. Yet there are certain commonly accepted modes of being in relationships.

There are several types of relationships that exist among human beings. Family relationships, romantic relationships, parental relationships, extramarital relationships etc., are few among them. Being in a relationship is an added responsibility and obligation as the success of any relationship is the collective result of the attitudes, behavioral patterns and personal preferences of two or more people included in the relationship. There are few relationship myths; usually people believe to be true. Let us explore few of such commonly held relationship myths.

There is a Soul Mate or True Love for Every Person

It is an obvious myth and also a mistake to believe that each and every person has a true love or soul mate. You get into relationship with a person not because

Why Some People Choose to Remain Single

Irrespective of the dictums outlined in religious texts and principles about the importance of marriage; the decision whether to go in for one or to remain single is essentially personal in nature where the questions of scriptures or rules of theologians should not come into play. This is particularly true of the current situation marked by extremes of stress, strain and struggle; in spite of all its techno savvy benefits.

  • With much thrust upon competition and rat race; a man’s common place existence is one of extreme struggle and strain. This in turn is working havoc on marital and other relationships based on close bonding and trustfulness. Sometimes the sheer apprehension that things may not work out fine on home front has compelled people desirous of climbing up the social order to stay single.
  • People with a sharp or obsessive focus on career and personal growth often prefer staying single rather than bracing up to the duties and obligations of marriage. Paucity of time and personal inability to share and care keep them away from relationships and marriage.

Other than social and economic factors, there are people who preferred singularity over marital status on account of their lack of commitment. Rather than going

Common relationship problems and tips to solve them

Every relationship being very complex in nature and function obvious issues can occur at any point of a relationship. No one can exactly predict what may happen at what time in a relationship. There are several very common issues observed in relationships. The nature and intensity of the issues depend on the mode of relationship and dept of emotional attachment.

The initial stages of relationships are generally found to be stable and free of greater issues as the adjustment and tolerance are more. But as the time passes on and the formal ways are replaced with the casual attitudes the issues can come up. If not taken the right measures of problem solving, they can spoil the relationship and end in breakups.

Poor communication

Poor communication is one of the greatest causes for most of the bulging issues in any communication. There should be very strong and clear communication between the partners in a relationship. Many a time issues occur not because there is a specific cause, but because the communications get misunderstood. If the messages reach the wrong way to the partner, there can be obvious gaps between the people and a complete breakup in the future.

Do not presume that the partner

Mistakes That can Damage a Relationship

So fragile, yet lovely; this is the most fitting definition to any relationship, be it marriage, romance or living together. No one is perfect in the world, at least when it comes to relationships. People often commit mistakes. It is a common rule referring the human behavior that men learn from mistakes. But at the same time, some mistakes, if committed may cause irreparable damage to relationships and life itself.

It is always advisable to avoid relationship mistakes as relationships are union of two people; thus a mistake committed may affect both of them. Certain mistakes may lead to unfixable breakups and being sorry after committing a mistake may not help regaining the trust and love of the person. Let us see some of the most common mistakes people commit when they are in relationships.

Losing Control

If you want to sustain the relationship further or for the lifetime, be in control of yourself. Many people lose control easily, especially with the life partner. Marriage or mutual agreement of getting into relationship is not a license to express as you feel it. Losing control is a sign of considering the partner less important or inferior. Frequent act of losing control in conversations or

Secretes of a Happy Relationship

Relationships like marriage, romance, live together or any of similar kinds can be sustained with a happy note if some of the secret rules are followed. Relationship is completely subjective and no clear cut rules can be executed on it, yet following certain guidelines may help proceeding happily in a relationship.

Many of these, so called, rules are based on the life experience of many happy couple and also the observation of people. When two people get into relationships, many of them wish for lasting relationships. But pathetically, a good number of them go apart after a while, in search of new partners. Let us see the secrets that constitute long lasting relationships or ever remaining relationships.

Breakup and Divorce are not the Solution

When asked about the best possible way of resolving the issues in relationships or marriage, many people may comment that breakup or a divorce is the best possible method of putting an end to all the troubles in a relationships. It is the biggest mistake people commit.

The reason for increased divorce rate is analyzed as the mentality of people who even before getting into a relationship think divorce as means of solving possible issues in it. Divorce is never

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